Today we welcome a guest post by TF! Thanks for joining us as a guest author!
*Disclaimer from TF: writer is Doccubiased
Okay, so the worst has happened. Tamsin finally weaseled her way into Bo’s bed. Meh, it was disappointing, but not totally surprising. That bit of unpleasantness aside, every episode of Lost Girl presents some challenges when attempting to analyze and understand it. At times some have fallen on a spectrum between perfume commercials and Matthew McConaughey’s Lincoln spots.
Something that I personally find unique to Lost Girl is that it’s nearly impossible to consider the show itself without contemplating things on a meta level. I’m sure I’m not the only one for whom that’s become unavoidable.
As seasons have gone by, some fundamental changes in the show have resulted in Lost Fans. While I understand the attrition, unless Bo starts kicking puppies, I’m willing to stick it out until the end. Things might look bleak for us Doccubus fans, but I’m nothing if not annoyingly optimistic. As such, I’m not convinced they’ll (we’ll) be denied a happy ending yet.
Alrighty then, 5×05… cover me, I’m going in.
Things started off with Bo contemplating a birthday gift from her father. The turn-handle music box we saw in a season two promo. Well hello, continuity, it’s so good to see you. Realizing the need for insight, and generally being all WTF, Bo called our favorite snarky oracle Cassie and arranged a time to meet with her.
Sans lollipop and dressed like a grown up, Cassie was on a date with Heratio. I quickly ID’d him as the bad guy. Mostly because of the intense, extended eye contact usually reserved for optometrists, but him declining a reading from Cassie was a big clue too.
After dropping Cassie off at her apartment, and scoring a kiss Heratio Creeper, OD left. Giddily, Cassie contemplated a second date and prayed for him to be generous of peen, which has to be a little counterintuitive. Probably unrelated to her impure thoughts, Cassie seemed to be seized by the migraine from hell. Screaming in pain, she held her head, and squeezed her eyes tightly shut. The significance of which would become brutally apparent later.
Primary plot line, check. Next we saw Lauren and Tamsin hastily trying to find a birthday gift for Bo. Nothing says thoughtful like guiltshopping and buying the first thing you see.
Okay, show, I’ll play along even though I don’t believe for a hot second that the love of Bo’s life forgot her birthday, then bought her a meaningless knick knack. The woman who previously attended Bo’s birthday party, while knowing her only a short time, and on the same day her comatose girlfriend woke up from a five year cursenap, is not someone who would forget her special day. Yeah… no.
Inexplicably, Lauren and Tamsin presented Bo with a stuffed cat, and what I think was an oddly posed frog knick knack. Bo feigned appreciation well enough, but really Tammy, in all your lives you’ve never learned the fundamentals of gift giving? I guess not since you think taxidermy means you care enough to give the very best. Lauren, sweet, beautiful, geek-speaking Lauren, even if they’re just friends, no one should give that to anyone as a gift.
Bo’s array of presents were not fantastic. On top of Dead Kitty, Stuffed-Kitty-Little Ball of Doom, and the knick knack that immediately ended up broken at Bo’s feet, Trick gave her the finger of Alexander the Fae. Perfect, because every girl wants the necrotized digit of an old, dead guy. Dyson did not go to Jared, in fact, he didn’t give Bo anything at all. Hmmmmm.
Bo left to check on Cassie with Tamsin in tow while Lauren stayed behind to put together a party for Bo. To no one at all, Lauren bemoaned not being needed by anyone as she picked up shattered pieces of knick knack: a metaphor for her dignity perhaps?
The gift of the cat turned out to be truly awful in more ways than one. In addition to the gross factor, and failing hard as a decorative accent, the spirit with which it was imbued curled up in Bo because Lauren dissed it. So P.S., Bo started slowly turning into a cat. Seems legit.
Finding only the bloody aftermath of a potentially fatal encounter at Cassie’s place, Bo determined to find out what became of the missing oracle. Oh, two of her oracle friends had gone missing too.
Meanwhile, back at the clubhouse, Lauren was doing the “important stuff.” She herself stating for a second time that she’d been given a seat at the kid’s table.
Despite the possibility that Bo could end up on a permanent diet of Meow Mix, she decided to follow her instincts hoping they’d lead to Cassie and friends.
Because she’s amazing like that, Lauren simultaneously baked while determining the crime scene blood types – human and fae, by the way. Hmmm. It wasn’t hard to imagine Kenzi’s look of revulsion as she delivered some gem about refusing to eat cake made in close proximity to vials of blood. Gosh I miss her.
After pumping skeevy old Seymour for information, and setting up an online dating profile, Bo went on a date with Heratio. During those respective scenes, two additional ‘peen’ comments were made. Specifically, blow job jokes: one by Tamsin (to Bo) and one by Bo (to Heratio.) Maybe it’s just me, but I feel like that’s at least two too many.
I don’t live in a convent or anything, but this sort of thing kind of made me feel like I was in a frat house. Adult female characters who seem like they’re channeling Eric Cartman are puzzling. They’re especially so when part of a show that emphasizes smart, ‘strong women.’ For me, the minimum requirement for a great female character is that she not talk and act like an immature dude.
I’m really bewildered by Tamsin’s tendency to manspread on the couch, eat like a savage, and talk like a 14 year old boy too. What’s even more confusing though is her vacillation between personalities ranging from Forlorn Misfit Tamsin, to Introspective Over Sharing Tamsin, to Lovesick (bordering on obsessive) Tamsin, to Mean Girl Tamsin. Love can make you do crazy things, but other than that, and being threatened by Lauren, I’m not grasping the reason for the erratic personality changes.
In a manner that could only be described as unfathomable, and, well, maybe insane, Bo insisted on driving to find Cassie… while blindfolded. Sure, no problem. Hesitating for only a minute, Tammy claimed shotgun. Lauren wisely thought better of it. After being goaded into it by Tamsin’s particularly obnoxious effort to one up her though, Lauren unwisely, and in no way gracefully, fell into the back seat.
That was the first of several instances where Tamsin taunted Lauren. Conveniently, the blindfold kept Bo from seeing Tamsin flip off the good doctor. Bo surely wouldn’t be happy since she undoubtedly still loves Lauren.
I’m sorry, but Bo has never and will never look at anyone the way she looks at Lauren. Fact. Bo still lurves Lauren. She tipped her hand with the longing, adoring look she gave her after Lauren removed that… thingy (who really cares?) from her shoulder.
Ostensibly, Bo being blindfolded was about forcing both Tamsin and Lauren to trust her. From what she heard, it’s possible that Bo could have perceived Tamsin doing that more readily. Really though, I didn’t feel as though Bo was paying all that much attention, and Lauren has implicitly trusted Bo since season one.
What happened to the amiable shopping buddy? When Bo was out of earshot, Mean Girl Tamsin informed Lauren that she’s not the only contender for Bo’s affections, to the tune of nonnie nonnie boo boo. To her credit, Lauren was both dubious and indifferent, stating that Bo was her concern at the moment. I’m grateful that Lauren isn’t pining for Bo, a la season 4 Dyson.
The story rolled on to include a vestigial interaction between Vex and Mark. I didn’t enjoy them playing rock, paper, guillotine for the right to get it on with two young women giving them the eye. Mark won what turned out to be a fork tongued blow job, which is gross on two levels. I’m sorry, but this isn’t really what I’d call sex positive. In my opinion, it feels more like pandering to a young, male audience. Particularly since it wasn’t necessary to the plot.
Mark emerged from the tryst, gratuitously shirtless – like father like son. He was made to look clever as he eluded retribution from the woman’s boyfriend, which made it more distasteful. I’ve always appreciated the way Lost Girl, for lack of a better word, punished douchenozzle-ish behavior like that. I haven’t been a big fan of Mark from the beginning, but this, and his subsequent treatment of Dyson, reduced him to an insufferable tool in my book. Dammit, who talked him out of running away?
We know that the women made a chump out of Mark, but we still had to endure his cocky gloating, sleazy wink and all. He figured out that Trick’s Fae autograph book was stolen by one of the women, but wasn’t all that worried or regretful because hey, blow job.
Meanwhile, back at the pit Bo fell into, (landing on her feet – I see what you did there, show) CatBo found Cassie, and the other two missing oracles, Delphi and Pithia in a gruesome state. Their hands were bound and their eyes were missing.
Lauren cared for Cassie in her special, reassuring doctor-y way. All while wearing her white lab coat. Bonus. In an unexpected twist, Cassie explained that she and the other oracles removed their own eyes. I was horrified too, Lauren.
It’s a feeling I experienced again when Tamsin came into Bo’s bedroom wearing a kimono, and bearing a cupcake. I fully anticipated Bo partaking of more than the cupcake. I wasn’t wrong. It’s not a huge deal that they had sex, it was the setup.
Aside from the fact that it’s nearly impossible to reconcile how this made sense given their history, Tamsin offered herself as a gift to Bo, bow and all. I cringed at both her wide eyed demeanor (complete with the turned ankle normally associated with coy innocence) and what could only be described as self-objectification.
It didn’t deter Bo, which I get. She’s a single succubus who has needs. Fulfilling them with Tamsin didn’t seem especially meaningful to her though. Perhaps that relationship will deepen, again, despite the logic in it. They did have post coital sharing time. The likes of which is long overdue for Bo and Lauren. It would be so welcome even without the sex.
This Tambosex on the heels of Bo’s uncomfortable, albeit accidental, romps with her step mother and her ex-boyfriend’s kid, really make it challenging to root for Bo.
That has become increasingly hard to do since she’s had her own unappealing personality shifts. Honestly, I had less of a problem with Bo sleeping with Dyson’s son than I did her deciding that sex was the best thing for a young man who was distressed and pouring out his heart to her. This was not the principled, protective Bo we grew to know and love throughout seasons one and two.
I think Dyson knew what happened because it’s very plausible that he smelled Mark on Bo when she came to see him. I suspect this will drive a wedge between Bo and Dyson, which serves to extract him from the now seemingly all female triangle. I wish this scenario could offer positive representation that was heretofore unknown. About this though, I’m not feeling so optimistic. I am, however, happy to be proven wrong, it’s happened a time or two.
Oh, P.P.S. since Seymour inhaled the cat, Bo was spared from life as a feline.